The Recovering Man Learns To Love “Feeling The Burn”

If God sends you a mosquito, SWAT IT or He will send you a swarm. One of the terms we used to use for getting our dope was “scratching the itch.” Today, I see how this was so spot on to how I lived my life in that constant state of reaction to the outside world. I also see how …

A Christmas Wish From A Parent Of An Addict

Jolly Old Saint Nicholas Lean Your Ear This Way And Bring Our Addict Children Pain That Drugs Can’t Take Away I Never Thought I’d Ask For This Or See It As A Gift But Pain Seems To Be The Only Thing That Causes Us To Shift They’re Not Naughty They’re Not Nice Despite What Others Say They’re Just Lost And …

Sometimes Preventing Relapse Can Be As Simple As A Good Cry

Recently, I attended a men’s event where part of the training was around empathy. One man told a story about losing his son in a car accident while the man standing beside him wept uncontrollably. By the end of the story the other man was on his knees crying out at the top of his lungs. It struck me that …

Why Finding Your Why May Not Be As Important As Finding Your Who

Sometimes you have to look outward to see inward. Simon Sinek’s TED talks on finding your “why” have really inspired a lot of people including me. As I reflect on my journey as a recovering man I see that finding my “why” has been an important piece in both my victories and defeats along the way. There were many times …

7 Practices For Creating Your “Most Wonderful Time Of The Year”

How To Get Your Holiday S.W.A.G.G.E.R. On. Anyone who knows me, knows that I love challenging the status quo when it comes to how we define things in our culture. One of my favorite ways to do that is by redefining words in the language I use for my own self talk. Words are probably the most powerful tools I …

Be Careless What You Wish For

Care-less: (adjective) not giving sufficient thought to avoiding harm or error What comes to mind when you hear the word “careless?” For me it brings up other words like reckless, irresponsible, and shallow. All words that describe virtues that I was taught to avoid like the plague. Merriam-Webster will give words their commonly accepted definitions but, we all have our …

Fog On The Mirror

There’s fog on the mirror, it’s blocking my gaze As I search for the man from my yesterdays My heart becomes heavier the longer I stare For only the fog am I seeing in there My vision is yearning for some little sign A small slice of beauty that I can call mine Despite all my efforts I fill with …

What Is A Recovery Life Coach?

As a recovery life coach, I’m often confused with many other professionals in the recovery industry who have very important and very different roles than me. I’m not a therapist, counselor, sponsor, sober companion, or guru. I do the same thing as coaches do in any other industry. I help you achieve results fast by taking action. My role is …

I Thought Living A Sober Life Meant Giving Up My Manhood

As I reflect on the early days of my addiction recovery I’m struck by the things I was willing to give up to get clean. I truly was at the point where I was willing to do anything to make the intense pain go away. The failed marriages, lost relationships with my kids, and destroyed career opportunities were at the …

Sometimes A Man Just Needs A Good Blow Job

There hasn’t been any shortage of excitement in the southern US this fall as Mother Nature made many of us her cuckold for a couple weeks. She sent my wife, Kristin and I packing as Irma was bearing down on us with all the wrath of a woman scorned. Regrettably, we didn’t get a chance to cuddle after our encounter …