Despising My Addicted Child Was Easier Than Looking At The Truth About Myself

Nothing is more powerful than the story a man creates about himself. -Greg Boudle It took years of enduring the massive pain of wrestling with my emotions, to discover that the source of it was always within me. It was something that I invested my entire life feeding and nurturing and began long before any seeds were ever planted that …

To Enable or Not To Enable

Stop second guessing yourself every time your addicted loved one asks for help. I spent years doing this with my own kids. Every time I refused to “help” them when they asked for money, food, shelter, or any of the hundreds of things they asked of me while in their active addiction, I got this sick feeling in my stomach. …

Tough Love Is A Crock

5 Things That Great Fathers Taught Me About Loving An Addict Tough Love   [noun]   promotion of another person’s welfare, especially that of an addict or criminal, by requiring them to take responsibility for their own actions. Love and fear can never co-exist in the same space. I’ve heard many parents in the rooms express their frustration with tough love and …

Recovery Without A Why Is Like A Fat Kid Eating Cake

5 Questions You May Want To Ask Before Your Next Meeting I’ve been addicted to so many different things in my life that I’ve lost count. In our society we tend to identify addiction with the substances and behaviors that cause the greatest harm to the greatest amount of people but, in my experience we can become addicted to anything. …

Looking At Your Shit.

Emotions are just mind turds -Guru Doodoo Is it just me, or do other people give their shit a once-over just before it descends down the toilet drain? This morning I was struck with a brief moment of panic while inspecting the by-products of what I allowed into my body the day before. The self-talk started running rampant with thoughts of …

Cracking The Code Of My Father’s Love

May is all about the women in my family. My mother-in-law, sister, daughter, and granddaughter all were born on May 9. Every six years or so May 9 also is also Mother’s Day so that makes it even more interesting since they are all either mothers or will be one day. June, on the other hand causes me to shift …

Two Power Tools For Beating Overwhelm.

If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse. – Jim Rohn I might be one of the most naturally unorganized men on the planet. If you looked at my desk it would give you a pretty good idea of what the inside of my head must look like on most …

3 Things An Addict Needs To Prevent Relapse and Live Their Dreams

 I was a chronic relapser. Frustration is no stranger to me. In fact I’m frustrated right now because I’m writing this whole blog over for a second time after my site crashed the first time. I laugh when I think about how disillusioned I was, early in my recovery, thinking my frustrations would somehow disappear as soon as I found …

Don’t Let Your Dick Size Ruin Your Life

Size Matters Only to a Sleeping Giant Life started out pretty good for me, growing up in a small town in Connecticut. We lived in a rural area where my daily playmates were my sister and the two girls who lived next door. I had male friends who would come over occasionally but most of my days were filled with …

Dad: How To Deal With Your Addicted Son

Before you give up, remember who is watching you. As a men’s recovery coach, I’m always encouraged when I get a phone call from a father with an addicted son. That’s because the majority of them come from moms who are desperate because they’re losing both their sons and husbands through this crisis. In most cases, a son’s path to …